Christspeak, Rx

A lot has happened in the past several months that is certainly worthy of debate on the blogosphere. So far I've resisted all urges to engage in anything other than reading the actual news... and I can't exaggerate the significance of the inner peace I've found in abstaining from such debates.

There is a great life lesson in one such event that occurred, and I hope my observations transcend political ideologies. My favorite morning show, (the only MSNBC show I watched), is gone forever. I loved the show because it is where I learned the human side of many public figures I often disagree with politically.

Actually, the Don Imus story is hardly a tragedy for him. He is sober. He is a good husband and a loving father. He is wealthy. He is generous. He is loyal. And now he knows who his true friends really are.

Ever read the parable of the Prodigal Son? A central part of that story is that as soon as the young man's money ran out, all those "friends" he enjoyed and who benefited from his wealth disappeared from his life.

In Imus's case, his wealth was his medium. His show was popular and therefore many powerful, well known journalists, executives, writers, authors, publishers, bloggers, musicians, companies, politicians- Republican and Democrat- eagerly made extreme efforts to be counted as his friend. I imagine Russert, Matthews, Gregory, all the execs at CBS and MSNBC have long understood his grouchy demeanor and his contrived bigotry (of which he was constantly called out on by his side kick, Charles McCord.) What's more revealing is just how fast all of Imus's supposed friends and business associates publicly disassociated themselves with his show, as if they would rather be dead than stand by the man who contributed far more to their success and popularity than he received from them.

There is no good reason for Imus to say many of the things he has said. But anyone who watched or listened to his program for more than a week or two could understand that nothing he said was ever meant to be taken personally, literally or seriously. Nothing, that is, but his devotion to charities and to his family and friends.

Maybe we shouldn't allows shows like his. The irony is rich. The very people who claim to be advocates of free speech by defending pornography, flag burning and other culturally derisive forms of expression permanently censure one of their own. Were hundreds of thousands calling for his head? Were religious leaders/organizations petitioning for his dismissal? (Though I'm sure no one would condone it.) No. The Rutgers team asked for a retraction and apology and got it. What about CBS and MSNBC? They allowed themselves to be bullied by a few talented shakedown artists.

Imus was/is careless with his words, and it cost him his job. But he has integrity. He took full responsibility for his words. And I'll bet the girls from Rutgers not only forgive him, but can count themselves fortunate to be called his friends.

"Words have meaning." It may be a cliché in the blogosphere, but our word(s) is our power. I am learning just how powerful my word really is. Looking back at my use of this power, it has been painful to recognize how careless, ambivalent and thoughtless I’ve regarded my word.

The power of our word begins with integrity. Doing what I say I will do, when I said it would be done, and whenever I fail to keep my word I will accept full responsibility. I find most people I share this concept with fail to understand just how important integrity is in every aspect of our lives. Perhaps it is because I am learning about it in the most intimate manner possible, in therapy, I am grasping its significance.

This is not to say most people I know lack integrity. Quite the opposite is true. I think most of my family, friends, and even acquaintances live and work with the highest degree of integrity, as if it is their second nature. For that very reason, a person who has a high esteem for integrity is likely pursue its depth and significance in their lives.

As I said, I am learning the power of my word. It’s a thick book with many chapters, but here is what I want to share with my fellow bloggers; just how powerful our words are to other people.

Counselor: I don’t talk about others or gossip any more, Chip. Do you know why?

Me: Well, it is wrong…

C: I used to do it all the time, until I understood the power of my word.

Me: I guess I don’t understand completely.

C: We have the power to create with our word. You are a Christian, think back to Genesis… God said “let there be light.” And what happened next?

Me: There was light.

C: Absolutely. We have the same power. We say it will be done and we do it. And guess what? We have the power to create as well.

Me: Go on…

C: Suppose I look out my window and see my neighbor do something really dumb. I laugh and share it with my wife. Later that week I share it a neighborhood party, in the funniest manner possible, about what a bonehead this guy really is. I’ve just created a permanent picture of how all those people will view my neighbor.

C: Now that’s power. Once I realized the power my words hold, I quit talking about others.

I have been taught all of my life that it is wrong to gossip and/or speak ill of others. (And yet I’ve always acted as if there’s no real harm in it.) I know the Bible, which I believe is God’s word, says it is wrong as well. But I never understood why until I began to understand the true power of my word.

When I quit blogging on a regular basis, I said I wanted to learn how to write so that people would respond to my written word in the same manner they do with me in person. I don’t know if that is possible for me with my limited skills and experience. But I do know that I want to be regarded as man who is straightforward and kind; smart and humble; positive and encouraging.

If my word holds any power at all, I want that power to be a blessing to all within its reach.